Forgiving Yourself

Sometimes we live in dejection, depression and disgruntled about ourselves due to due the fact that we have given in to one sin or the other. People end up condemning themselves and being up able to move on in life because they find it hard to forgive themselves.

One of the reasons for this is because we are either perfectionists or have perfectionistic tendencies. This makes us have unreal expectations of ourselves thus, when we err and make mistakes we tend to feel dejected and wonder “how we could do such a thing” hence unable to forgive ourselves.

Another reason can be because of low self-esteem, and we falsely believe that we are not worthy of forgiveness.

In order to find self-forgiveness, we should :

1)      Go to God to confess our sins, mistakes and shortcomings to him. The Bible says "If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He [God] is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness."(1John 1:8-9)

When we confess our sins to God, He does forgive us regardless of our feelings. This brings peace to our minds and spirit and reconnects us to God.

2)     Face the Cause: ask God to give you the insight and courage to face the root cause of your inability to forgive yourself. If you seek this truth with all your heart, when you are ready to face and accept it, you will see it.

3)     Quit being a perfectionist: see yourself the way God sees you and stop expecting more of yourself than God is. Remember, when you confess your sins and failures to him, he forgives you fully and freely.

4)     Regularly say to yourself: "Since God has forgiven me, I forgive myself." Repeatedly stating this with deep emotion or feeling, can help to program this truth into your unconscious mind and into your belief system. Once you truly believe this truth, you will be able to feel forgiven.

5)     Fight the Feelings: sometimes our feelings betray our faith. We could believe God for something but feel like something else. God does not deal with us based on our feelings He deals with us based on His word. So, if God said it, I believe if, that settles it. Yes, this may be difficult to do, but do it anyhow because it is based on God's Word and not your feelings. Just don't allow your damaged emotions to control your life.